Quackadoo Airlines

After a brief break here is the next part of my flying story

After six years of flying small aircraft it was time to move into heavy metal. I had survived the interview process, been measured for uniform, now it was time to train.

Training consisted of three parts. First was ground theory, then flight simulators then a check to line flight. Ground theory was mainly computer based training, with some lectures. I soon discovered to get the work done early, as after lunch was much more conducive to a nap, and better to be seen doing it in front of the computer. The lessons covered all aspect of the aircraft and emergency training. Emergency procedures was fun, jumping down slides, floating in rafts and putting out fires. Unfortunately at every stage there were exams. Exams on engines, exams on checklists, exams on navigation. Fail any of these and the threat of an early exit hung over our heads. After a month of ground school the twelve on my course were cleared for take-off in the simulators.

The simulator centre runs twenty four seven, and as we were a low priority we got to enjoy the pleasures of the 11pm and 3am time slots. Each session was four hours long.  You were teamed up with a partner (crash buddy as they are known) for the duration of sim training.   You both take  turns in flying the plane and helping the other  fly. It was great, not quite the same as a real plane but fantastic fun. We covered the basics then more advanced manoeuvres and then went through every possible emergency. After about ten sessions it was time for the check. This was a terrifying ordeal, you don't want to make a mistake here.  After an hour long grilling from a Check Captain and a four hour session in the simulator to see what we had learnt and that we could cope with what may lay ahead we were done.  It felt like a huge weight of the shoulder.  Now we had just one more hurdle to jump; the line check.

Starting out as a third pilot meant the line check was not meant to be to hard.  Rumour had it only one person had ever failed, I didn't want to make it two.  It was a great trip to a foreign country where I got to learn how thinks actually happened in a normal environment.  Had some deep and meaningful conversations with the Captain as he ticked off boxes on a questionnaire, and when on the ground was encouraged to drink and eat far too much in reverse time zones to my body telling me it was.  I was introduced to many Quackadoo traditions, and had an amazing time.  The best experience though was being told at the end I was good to go, I had passed.

After nearly four months of training I was signed off as a relief pilot, it would only take twelve months and I would be back in the Sim for First Officer training.

Simulator

I should absolutely not be typing a blog entry right now.  I should be reading, studying and thinking.  Yes it is Simulator time at work.  Every four months at Quackadoo Airlines we get to sit in the magic dark box that thinks its an aeroplane, whilst some sadistic maniac with an obsession for making things go wrong puts us through our paces.  This is part of the job I hate, and most pilots hate (if they say they don't they are lying).  If all goes well we get to keep flying, if we don't do well it is more training or even the door, so the pressure is on.

The simulator is just one of the many ways pilots are checked each year, each check needs to be passed before you can continue to fly and is certainly not something I remember being advertised when I wanted to be a pilot.  We do three simulators, sometimes four (sometimes more), a flight check in the aircraft, security training, emergency procedures training and occasional other courses.  There is always something to study for.

I shouldn't get stressed by the simulator but I do.  Any test situation is stressful.  Before you even get into the sim there is 45 minutes of questions with a senior examiner, and you better know your stuff or they will be annoyed and the sim will not go well, you do not prod the sleeping bear! 

Once inside the magic box you settle in for four hours of fun.  Usually, and every session is different, we fly varying instrument approaches to check we know what we are doing.  Many of these will be with an engine not working or another malfunction to make sure we know how to handle all situations (best to do in the sim not the air!).  Yes it is a good learning experience, but fun it is not.  We also look at flying in unusual situations and sharpening our skills.

After the end of the four hours the examiner will point out where you went wrong or what you can improve and if all was good then back to work you go.  I remember my first sim after being checked out at Quackadoo, the examiner said I looked nervous.  I replied that it was my first renewal and yes I was nervous.  He replied don't worry, only about 140 more to go until you retire.  Ten years later I think I probably now have 105 more left, give or take.  Perhaps with time they will get easier, and my wife won't have to put up with a grumpy hubby in the house.